We must put aside our petty differences and vote for 'goblin mode' over 'metaverse' as the Oxford Word of the Year
Reject metaverse, return to goblin.
Please do this for us: Go over to the Oxford University Press Languages website and vote for goblin mode to be word of the year.
I'm asking this because for the first time in history Oxford is letting you, the general public, choose what their word of the year will be. "We wanted to open up the final step of our Word of the Year selection process to the true arbiters of language: people around the world," said what is perhaps the most venerable institution of the english language.
To ease that, Oxford's "team of expert lexicographers" have decided on three words to choose from for the crown, and one of them is the fucking metaverse. Need I remind you? The metaverse is bullshit. The other choice is #IStandWith which is such a milquetoast prefix-ass modifier I ain't even gonna start.
So please y'all go vote for goblin mode. Because goblin mode rules. What is Goblin Mode? "The idea of rejecting societal expectations put upon us, in favour of doing whatever one wants to," says Oxford. Is that not what we're here to do, PC gamers? Are we not here to revel in our sixth consecutive round of a MOBA rather than go to the grocery store? (Amen.) Are we not here to tweak the voltage on our processor by 1% rather than touch grass?
Please go vote for our lifestyle. Go vote for taking care of yourself and having joy in rejection of society's stifling norms. Vote for not taking a shower today and eating a whole bag of chips and taking bites of cheese right off the block and building a tower of empty drink cans beside your monitor over the course of a 12-hour session. Vote for sneaking in a cheeky Vampire Survivors round during a baby's nap. Vote for not putting on any makeup or brushing your hair or changing out of your pajamas. Vote for the energy of trying to enjoy yourself rather than better yourself.
Because we're begging you. The metaverse that CEOs want to sell you is awful, a worse version of the internet that's bound to collapse like all the variously absurd ponzi schemes it's based on.
Don't just do it for us, of course. Do it for goblins everywhere. Do it for goblin mode.
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You can vote for the Oxford word of the year on their website: languages.oup.com.
Jon Bolding is a games writer and critic with an extensive background in strategy games. When he's not on his PC, he can be found playing every tabletop game under the sun.