The lows
Samuel Roberts: Red Dead Deflation
Red Dead Redemption 2 still isn't confirmed for PC just yet, which is no huge surprise. Rockstar's one of the last big publishers not to release all of its games simultaneously on PC—and unlike Destiny 2, where we know it's coming to PC, even if it's a little bit later than consoles, here we have the ambiguity of wondering whether it'll come to PC at all.
It's almost certainly going to happen at some point, probably a year or so after release if GTA V is anything to go by. But damn, even if it was announced with a 'TBC' release date, that'd do me just fine.
Phil Savage: Slow and steady
That Valve has tweaked how Steam groups work to cut out some of the endless spam is a positive step, but one that feels like it should have been taken care of years ago. These are some simple, sensible changes that are being made—restricting group invitations to people on your friends list is hardly a radical overhaul. I'm not going to assume that even a small change to a platform this big is a quick and easy job, but Steam feels increasingly creaky as the years go by. The length of time it takes for some of these quality-of-life fixes to appear is worrying. Steam is a massive PC gaming platform, and its users deserve a better, more responsive service.
Wes Fenlon: Can't stop, won't stop (waiting)
I'm going to keep this short and to the point: I'm not killing Nazis in Wolfenstein: The New Colossus yet, and that is a shame.
Tyler Wilde: Real tears, virtual reality
Last night, I joined a virtual farewell party. There were speeches, and tribute videos, and audible sniffles from a crowd of low-poly humanoids. We roasted marshmallows and set off fireworks. I didn’t know anyone there—I had only played around in AltspaceVR a few times before—so I felt a little awkward, like a plus-one at a going away party for someone else’s friend. But it was moving, and testament to VR’s power. Altspace ran out of funding and couldn’t secure more, but it did bring a lot of people together, and they genuinely did care about each other. After the speeches, there was a series of selfies and a group hug. I left to explore other rooms, where voices reminisced about the games they played, and avatars mulled around looking for friends so they could exchange contact information. If VR has any future, I’m convinced it lies in social spaces like AltspaceVR, and I’m sad to see it go even if I was only an interloper.
Chris Livingston: Shotgun wedding
I was a bit dismayed to see the Stardew Valley marriage speedrun smashed this week, with a player named Underscore76 tying the knot in under thirty minutes of play. Don't get me wrong, I believe in the freedom of video game characters to marry the partner or partners of their choice (I myself once married a giant spider in a LOTR mod for Crusader Kings 2) but marriage is something that shouldn't be rushed into just to break a record.
The secret to a successful in-game marriage is to find the right companion, someone who makes you happy and fulfilled or at least carries your gear around and doesn't find it weird when you spend three days following her around Skyrim. It takes more than 25 minutes to make sure your virtual love is true, and I should know: I had to burn my spider-bride to death because of our differences (the main one being that she was a giant spider). Don't make the same mistake I did. Take it slow. There's more at stake than a record.
Joe Donnelly: Usain Bolt, mate
Listen. I like crossovers. And I like Pro Evolution Soccer—I even liked its most recent PES 2017 iteration more than FIFA. But answer me this: Why does Olympic sprinter and multi-gold medal-winning athlete Usain Bolt feature in Konami’s latest offering of The Beautiful Game? PES has always suffered in the official licensing department against FIFA’s monopoly, which to me makes this tie-in even stranger.
I’m perhaps a little bitter given I can’t play as my beloved Celtic in Pro Ev, but nevertheless this crossover is plain barmy. If anyone can explain it, please do so in the comments south of here.
