Rock of Ages review thumb
75

Rock of Ages review

Our Verdict

Knockabout in every sense, Rock of Ages is quirky, fun and characterful. Just dont expect longevity or depth.

PC Gamer's got your back Our experienced team dedicates many hours to every review, to really get to the heart of what matters most to you. Find out more about how we evaluate games and hardware.

Nothing is sacred to Rock of Ages. Priceless Greek urn? Smash it. Beloved historical figure? Squish them. Tragic Greek myth? Illustrate it by having tiny demons poke a man in the bottom. Anything that stops you from rolling your rock to the end of the course is there to be flattened.

Sessions of Rock of Ages have two phases. In the first you construct towers and catapults on your track to keep the enemy's rock away from the gate protecting your squishy leader character. In the second you roll your boulder along the enemy's heavily defended course and batter down the door to the opposing general. You use your defences to try to destroy or slow the enemy rock while taking the shortest possible path to your own target.

The rolling is the most fun by far. You're in direct control of the rock, which feels incredibly weighty and substantial as it skips, jumps and crashes through obstacles. Carefully guiding the boulder around, over or through defences, is where the real challenge lies – and crushing catapults, cows and elephants beneath your mighty boulder is just smashing. Occasionally you're interrupted by a pointless boss fight, which is nowhere near as much fun as the rest of the game. Still, it's hard to complain when you're defeating an animated version of Michelangelo's David by repeatedly hitting him in the stones.

Where the artistry of Rock of Ages crumbles is in that first, strategic-defence building phase. In theory it's the more thoughtful, tactical side of the game, with a whole variety of towers, animals and siege weaponry for you to deploy. The problem is that there's a very narrow window of opportunity in which to place your defences before your boulder is unleashed, so there isn't time to do much but scatter these things at a few key chokepoints. Multiplayer opponents are smarter and require more thought, but more often than not games end in a straight race between two rolling stones.

What keeps you coming back is the brilliant silliness of it all. Rock of Ages takes you on a tour through art history, having boulder-based battles with a variety of historical figures, from King Leonidas to Leonardo da Vinci. Each is represented by a cutout model based on famous paintings, dancing around and gibbering unintelligibly. The mix of highbrow art and lowbrow humour is clearly inspired by Terry Gilliam's classic Monty Python animations, and even if you know nothing about art it's hilarious to see that one picture of Vlad the Impaler that everyone uses starring in an impromptu Castlevania skit.

Rock of Ages provides a few hours of great fun, and the unique flavour and hilarious cutscenes are worth the budget pricetag. Don't expect it to hold up to repeated playthroughs, but this is a game about smashing up artwork with a big rock, and there's nothing wrong with that.

The Verdict
Rock of Ages

Knockabout in every sense, Rock of Ages is quirky, fun and characterful. Just dont expect longevity or depth.

Latest in Action
Monster Hunter Wilds' stockpile master studying a manifest
Monster Hunter Wilds' new gyro controls are a fantastic option for disabled and able-bodied players alike
Manhunt 2
I played the notoriously ratings-board-ravaged Manhunt 2 and was quite glad for the censorship actually
Commander Shepard in Mass Effect 3.
Mass Effect's Jennifer Hale, who played femshep, 'saw no line' before she recorded them for Bioware's flagship trilogy: 'It was all cold reading on the spot'
A hunter hefts a massive Mega Barrel Bomb in Monster Hunter Wilds.
Monster Hunter Wilds players can't stop blowing themselves to smithereens with its rollable barrel bombs
A hunter poses with a large hammer as their palico cheers nearby in Monster Hunter Wilds.
Monster Hunter Wilds weapon tier list
Naoe looking at the wrist blade in Assassin's Creed Shadows
Ubisoft backflips, says Assassin's Creed Shadows will support Steam Deck at launch, but I doubt I'll actually want to play it there
Latest in Reviews
Fragpunk FPS
Fragpunk review
Rise of the Ronin review
Rise of the Ronin review
SteelSeries QcK Performance mouse pads overlapping on a desk
SteelSeries QcK Performance mouse pad review
Soundcore Liberty 4 Pro earbuds on a black desk with various handheld gaming PCs.
Soundcore Liberty 4 Pro review
Alienware 27 AW2725Q QD-OLED
Alienware 27 AW2725Q QD-OLED review
Audio-Technica ATH-R50X headphones
Audio-Technica ATH R50X review