So, the Automatons are back in Helldivers 2. We thought we'd eradicated them but somehow, they've returned—grabbing the planet Cyberstan in their pneumatic claws before sweeping across the northwestern sector of the galaxy.
As if to add insult to injury, a fan-made edit of the game's Super Earth news broadcasts shows Automaton hackers tearing into your mandatory news briefings to drop the hottest diss track of the century. I mean, uh, some treasonous nonsense. All and any dissidents referring to it as "a bop" or "fire" should be reported to your nearest democracy officer for an immediate re-education on Super Earth approved music.
Shared by RecklessGaming on their YouTube channel and the game's subreddit (thanks, GamesRadar) the fan edit sees the Automatons roast the entirety of Super Earth with Topi & hayve's Full Speed. It's a fitting tune, considering it sounds like the whole club's laughing at you in binary.
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In an attempt to figure out how exactly I was insulted, I actually found a group of divers who have been working on translating the automaton language glyphs for a while, and it turns out the subtitles in the video are absolutely legible. Here's what I could bear to translate before my inner voice started speaking binary.
"Straight outta the creek / I rise with a cause / dissing super earth / and its democratic flaws," it continues: "Elite task force / Helldivers spreading fear / but listen close, Super Earth / Your end is near." The metre is a bit off, but I appreciate the effort that went into making it rhyme in two languages. I shan't translate the rest of it, because listening to the enemy is treason—I will, however, share the translation key here, courtesy of the Super Earth Special Forces Discord.
Honestly, I'd be impressed by this fan creation if it was a bunch of gibberish, let alone a legible rap painstakingly translated into glyphs. Unfortunately, the creation of enemy propaganda is punishable by dishonourable discharge. Offending parties must then be shot into space with a cannon that costs Super Earth taxpayers 5 billion Super Credits every time it's fired. I don't make the rules, sorry.
